


Of Masculinity And Happy Endings

by amako



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Crack Treated Seriously, F/F, F/M, Fix-It, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-09
Updated: 2017-09-09
Packaged: 2018-12-25 20:13:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,289
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12043422
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/amako/pseuds/amako
Summary: The first time Sasuke comes home, four years after the war, he's happy. Or, you know, as happy as you can be after all the shit that went down in his life, but whatever. Let's just go with happy, for the sake of keeping this short and not dramatic.





	Of Masculinity And Happy Endings

The first time Sasuke comes home, four years after the war, he's happy. Or, you know, as happy as you can be after all the shit that went down in his life, but whatever. Let's just go with happy, for the sake of keeping this short and not dramatic.

He expects a few things, coming back, because the people of Konoha have always been quite predictable and he enjoys knowing that they all follow a pattern. He enjoys even more knowing that he is going to ruin this pattern by coming back after the first four years of his mission and doing a canon ball in their metaphorical swimming pool of peace and normalcy.

So it's safe to say that when Sasuke makes his first step in the village, after four years of wandering and spying, he isn't ready for what Konoha is really like now.

What greets him first is a battle cry and a face full of glitter. He blinks a few times, speechless. There is a... battle? Chase? Game? happening at the gate. A bunch of jōnin are running around like children, covered from head to toe in glitter and paint, and happily bombing each other whenever they cross path.

In a puff of smoke, Izumo appears in front of him. There are laughter lines in the corner of his eyes, but he looks the same as in his memories.

 

"Hello, Sasuke-kun. Can I see your papers? I already sent someone to warn the Hokage of your return."

"Thanks," he whispers, handing his papers over. His eyes are still fixed on the mess going on around them, to which Izumo seems completely impervious.

"Alright, it's all good. Welcome back!"

 

Sasuke nods and starts walking, barely avoiding another green bomb. He's not even going to ask. With a sigh, he shunshins to the Hokage's office. He's barely out of the window when a pair of arms wraps around him. Sasuke hides a smile in Naruto's neck and returns the hug awkwardly with his single arm.

 

"I'm so happy you're back, 'ttebayo! You need to tell me everything, but first, we're going for ramen!"

 

Sasuke rolls his eyes but doesn't disagree. He follows his oldest friend, waving at Shikamaru where he's pretending not to procrastinate behind his desk. When they're outside, Sasuke can't help marveling at how different Konoha looks from his childhood. He can still recognize corners where Team 7 chased that damn cat, or where they played a prank on Kakashi. But mostly, he feels like he's walking in a whole new village.

Ichiraku is still the same, despite being rebuilt from scratch. Naruto smiles and talks and chuckles and never leaves his side and he almost feels at home. The ramen taste really good and he wonders. Maybe he'll stay a bit longer than he had planned, to enjoy this new Konoha.

 

"Sasuke!"

 

He turns, recognising the voice immediatly. And there she is, pink hair and green eyes and blinding smile. Except that's not the Sakura he knows. Really not.

This one has hair as short as Naruto, an ugly scar on her temple that runs up to her forehead. She's dressed in the standard uniform, not a bit of red in sight. And attached to her hip, there is a dark-haired child sticking his black eyes on Sasuke.

He can't help it. He freaks out.

The ramen bowl goes flying and he's on his feet the next second, his breathing a ragged mess. Naruto is instantly by his side, flailing when Sasuke fails to respond to his worried questions.

 

"Is that—"

 

He can't say it, the words are stuck in his throat. He feels sick. Did he— did he seriously abandon Sakura with his kid? Did she really had to raise him on her own because he was fuck-knows-where and couldn't be reached?

Sasuke swallows hard and tries to regulate his breathing. He takes a step forward and almost throw up at the instant wave of panic.

 

"Sakura, I'm so sorry. Please, forgive me, I'll make it right, I promise. You won't have to do this alone anymore, I swear it on the Uchiha shrine."

 

Sakura looks at Naruto, in a 'what the fuck is he going on about?' way. Naruto shrugs, his raised eyebrows betraying the same confusion.

 

"Sasuke? What are you talking about."

"I'm sorry you had to raise our son on your own. I should have checked more often to see how everyone had been doing."

 

By his side, Naruto's shoulders are shaking. Sasuke freezes, bracing himself for the punch he feels coming. He will deny the (manly) shriek that escaped him when Naruto exploses in laughter to his dying day. He looks at Sakura and see that she's shaking her head with an amused smile on her face.

 

"It's sweet of you to say that Sasuke, but this isn't your son. His name is Yūkan and his father is Lee."

"What."

 

The sudden intake of air is just too much and Sasuke (manly) passes out.

 

The first thing he feels is a slap on his cheek. He winces and slowly opens his eyes to Naruto's concerned face and Sakura's exasperated one. The child is sitting next to him, still staring at his face. Sasuke does _not_ whimper at that. Sakura helps him up and picks up the child again. This time, she sits him at the counter and Naruto offers the kid his ramen.

 

"How do you feel?"

"I'm fine," Sasuke groans, feeling the embarassment creeping up his neck. Sakura leans towards him, quickly checking that Naruto and Yūkan aren't looking at them.

"Look, we had sex only once before you left and I would have found some way to contact you if it had been your kid. Besides, I'm not one to keep a baby without knowing if the other party involved wants him."

"So you and Lee..?"

"For a while, yeah. Then Lee fell in love with someone else and when he told me, I realized that I didn't feel the same as at the beginning. It was a mutual decision. We live in the same part of town, so Yūkan moves depending on who's in mission at the time."

 

Sasuke frowns, trying to remember where Sakura's place had been when they first started to rebuild, just before he left. He might be mistaken, but he doesn't think it was near where Lee had moved. Sakura picks up on his confusion and indulges him after a bite of her dish.

 

"I've been adopted into the Inuzuka Clan. I'm training to be a tracker with Kakashi-sensei and Tsume-sama. Hana took over a year ago, so I mostly hang out with Kiba. Also I'm dating Neji. You know, in the interest of full disclosure."

 

This is all a bit much for Sasuke. He tries to clear the picture his mind is painting, but it's all so confusing, he has a really hard time doing that.

 

"You know what? Fuck that. Time for Radio Konoha: Gossip of the Week. Tenten has been promoted Jōnin Commander and she's dating Ino. Hinata destroyed the House System in her clan and she's working to erase the Cursed Seal. Shino has his weird thing with Kiba, I honestly don't want to know. Lee is dating the Kazekage, and I'm not jealous at all. I think Shikamaru is single, but you can never tell with him. Chōji went at it with Temari last year, but I think it was just a one time thing. Naruto is pining, but what's new. I think that's all."

"Pining?"

"You know. After your dumb ass."

 

That time, when Sasuke passes out, he does it in Naruto's arms (because he's done being manly and he's been pining for twenty years too).

 


End file.
